My Mom, My Inspiration
Who inspires you? One person who inspires me every day is my Mom. So in honor of Mother’s Day this weekend, I’d like to tell you about her.
“Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.” ~Helen Keller
1. Stay strong and follow the plan (as long as it’s still viable.)
My Mom is a strong, independent woman because of the lessons she’s lived through and learned from. She married at 20 and was widowed with two young children just before her 27th birthday. My Dad died from complications of diabetes when I was three years old, and my brother was 18 months. We lived in NJ because my father worked at Bell Labs; both sides of the family resided in Queens, NY. Mom was pressured to move back home to Queens and let our grandmother care for my brother and me while she got a job in the City. If she had, I would have had a very different life. My Dad had set her up financially when he died, so the house was paid off, and she had dividends from investments and Social Security to cover living expenses. He had clearly stated that he wanted us to grow up in the country, so she held to that goal, despite how lonely it might have been living far away from family. My Mom didn’t fold, and she easily could have in that situation. No one would have blamed my Mom if she’d moved back home. I’m glad she didn’t.
2. Create memories. Visit family. Go on that trip. Have dinner by candlelight. Make life special.
She always created memories for us by planning adventures from seeing the Rockettes at Rockefeller Center in NYC, camping in Letchworth State Park in Upstate NY, to having dinner by candlelight. She also ensured we had strong relationships with both sides of the family - my father’s and hers. For example, we often had great adventures spending Spring Breaks in Long Island with our cousins. Little did we understand then, but she was having great adventures, going to Puerto Rico and Spain in different years while we played with our cousins. Smart lady!
3. Continue to learn. Take that class. Try a new skill or hobby. Learn a new language. Challenge yourself and constantly improve yourself.
When I was in 2nd grade, we moved to Upstate NY to live closer to her older brother. My Mom realized that she needed a change. Plus, she recognized that my brother and I were growing up and would eventually move away to start our own lives. So she started taking night classes at the community college, eventually transferring to and graduating from Cornell while working full-time as a secretary. My Mom was the image of a 70s feminist.
4. Be adventurous. Visit a new place. Try new foods. It might be fun. Worst case, you learn something about yourself or others.
She remarried when I was 11 years old to parent a blended family of 6 kids, which brought its benefits and challenges. My stepfather’s job moved us to Taiwan for three years. My mom’s strength of character allowed her to take on this adventure and see it as an opportunity to grow and learn. [If the mom isn’t happy during an overseas assignment, the family often has a bad experience/moves home early.] My mom faced the challenges of living in a foreign country and showed us that life is an adventure. During the day, while we were in school, she explored the island visiting temples and factories. Then, we shared stories about our days at dinner. Her attitude made it an adventure for all of us. It was one of the best periods of my life, exploring and growing as a person.
5. Engage with your community. It could be through church or town - whatever’s important to you. Stay active and stay young.
My Mom became the head of USA Girl Scouts in Taiwan (having been a Girl Scout Leader in NJ when I was little) and then a sales representative for Northwest Airlines. She continued to work full-time when we moved back to the US and eventually became the first woman President of the town’s Lions Club and then the first woman District Governor for Southeastern Massachusetts. Today, she’s very active in her church, leading women’s programs and planning funerals, as well as running a day trippers club for women in the community to explore eastern Tennessee, where they retired. I think it keeps her young because she’s so active and engaged in her community. She’s a strong, independent woman, as Helen Keller says, due to her life experiences.
Over the past few weeks, I’ve been recording interviews with her about my childhood and her life. She is my inspiration as a mother, a person, and a businesswoman. Thanks, Mom, for being my mom and such a great role model. Happy Mother’s Day!
Let’s start a conversation about who inspires you
PS This picture was taken at Easter, just four months after my Father died. My Mom looks so confident and composed. And she sewed all our outfits herself!
